By Nicholas Andrew Halls
Synopsis: After escaping dinner with his family to attend a party with his girlfriend just outside Dortmund, Germany, a sheltered gamer witnesses the meteor shower overhead. The red snow that follows is just the first in a series of bizarre incidents that will culminate in a group of young adults, locked in a basement, fearful for their lives
Location: Dortmund, Germany
Tagline: Just don’t give in to peer pressure
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Adventure is calling… what will you do?
This entry was posted on Friday, June 7th, 2013 at 11:58 am
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Posted in: Day one scripts, Help, Uncategorized
You should be here and not there
Scary it maybe, don’t give in to fear
Seen many deaths? Cry not, not even a single tear
You should be here
Maybe in the snows whirling away precious time
After tonight the sun might still shine
You should be here
Breathing heavily in the cold
With or without jacket…. But a strange sight to behold
You should be here
Here and not there…. Partying harder
Drinking to stupor when death’s music goes louder
You should be here
Chilling out… isn’t it called fun?
Hanging out under the midnight sun!
You should be here
To bear witness to this horrific scenario
Meteorites bursting like volcano
You shouldn’t be here
It’s death calling out there
You shouldn’t be here
If you’re as scary as…. HERE!
Great flow to this story. Love the basement scene as well! I had an amazing visual while reading, which was a very fast read. Thank you for this!
Nicholas is a very talented young writer. He’s be very happy to read of this.
Liked this a lot. The descriptions of details really caught me (snowflakes bursting into the red spores – in fact … red snow!). There are a couple of little things like Jan standing by as he watches one kid drown another … but I suspect I’m mostly nit picking. Well done!
Yeah I was very fond of the visual and a director would love that too. We all want more from the drama and that’s no easy call from a 4 minute scene with no before or after.
Thanks mate. In relation to the drowning; Jan is watching from inside the house, and the drowning is happening in the pool outside, so there was nothing he could do to act immediately. But it’s certainly the catalyst for him to start panicking!
Hi, thrilling (basement, always scares me, we don’t know here in my country lol!) and captivating for you will answer what will come next once to see END; as all good film must leave to watcher! Good
Ahmed is the king. When Ahmed rates you, you know you’re good.
Noted, 100%
That’s a good point. One one hand, the author could argue that the use of the ‘tags’ allows for fast traffic through the story and easy identification for the reader on the other I wouldn’t want to see it on a long form work but I’m pretty sure Nicholas is aware of that. I believe he has written for the medium. Fast read, maximum impact etc.
Hi I enjoyed the script but as an actor I hate the script to say Jan’s Mother, GrandMother, Father etc
Writers should know that as actors we like to have a name for our characters.
But other than that, I enjoyed it.